Homework!

Just a homework i had to prepare for the most kick-ass class i've heard of...

The night was cold and silent when i stepped outside and started to walk down the street. I was in no hurry. There was still time and the light of the moon kept good company.
Suddently the weather became windy and i could feel certain parts of my body getting smaller. "That's why men hate the cold!" i said to myself after slipping my hand deeper in my pockets. I turned my eyes back to the moon and i could feel it smiling back at me. I stopped for a moment trying to keep my head together and i heard a strange voice.
-Dude, why are you walking down the street tonight? It's really cold out here!
-Moon?! What the hell... Confused i decided really fast to go with the flow. Well, you know... Inside i could feel everything moving, the T.V. had only comedy channels, the radio as well and it seems that the letters on my keyboard were running away from my fingertips. So i got really scared and decided to leave the damned house because, i figured, it might be haunted by Joker- you know, the evil character from Tom & Jerry...
-You mean Batman!
-Exactly! Anyway, on my way to the door i decided to say goodbye to my little fridge and the basterd opened his door and kicked me in a bad place! Without feeling the pain i screamed and raced myself to the door... Of course i won because the other me had no socks on! I'm bad-ass, right?! High five dude! Anyway, when i was finally at the door i remembered that my girlfriend asked me to do the dishes and buy some more milk and cookies. Personally, i have no idea why she asked me that, it's not Christmas, you know, Santa isn't coming tonight! Anyway, as far as i know the supermarket closes at 10 PM and judging by your position on the sky, i recon it's only 9 PM now. So i'm just walking down the street with my Nike's on, keeping it cool, admiring you... Say, you do are gorgeous Moon, you know that? I just love you pale light and those beautiful blue eyes of yours...
-Dude, I'm a dog, what the hell?!
-Aaaaaaa! Fear just overwelmed me and my legs started running with the speed of light. The sad part was that each leg wanted to go in a different direction. "No, this can't be happening right now! Stupid legs, work together, you're a team! Please, take me far away from the talking dog!" i regained control of them quickly.
After like an eternity i looked back and saw nothing so i decided to stop and catch my breath for a while. The moon was still up there watching over me but i knew better: "No more looking at the Moon tonight mister! Eyes on the road!" i commanded myself. Obviously i followed my own orders but could not help going 10 more meters to the right where a really cute kitty was lying on the ground. As i approached she raised her head and looked at me with her eyes filled with fear:
-Dude, are you crazy?! A fucking talking dog!? She screamed...

Indeed pointless ^^